My Sister-In-Law’s In my Face(book)
Dear Mouthy Housewives,
My sister-in-law stalks our family’s Facebook comments and gets all up in their business when she doesn’t like what they have to say. Or, she watches for Facebook posts that are alcohol related so she can flip out and tell them they need to remove it.
A while back she went off on a niece for posting about a drinking game, then took herself off Facebook, then came back and us trying to “refriend” everyone. I haven’t accepted her friend invite because I’m putting off that drama. Cut to this weekend when the niece posted again about a drinking game and I commented that “this seems to be a theme with you, watch out or I will tell Barb.” She read it, didn’t see any humor, and now I’m f*#&ed.
These people are all on my husband’s side. He doesn’t know yet, but I’m sure a passive aggressive remark or two will come his way soon. Should I continue to ignore all this and chalk it up to bat shit crazy, or lower myself to trying to do damage control, which I am NO good at?
Signed,
My Sister-In-Law Be Crazy
_______________________________
Dear SIL Be Crazy,
My, what an interesting problem you have. To be honest, I usually skip over any questions that land in our in-box that contain the words “sister-in-law” or “Facebook,” mostly because I don’t have any sisters-in-law and refuse to use Facebook until Barry Manilow accepts my friend request.
But let’s see if I can still come up with something.
In my opinion, using Facebook to pass judgment on your family is about as passive-aggressive as it gets. No es bueno, mi amiga. (But, uh, Cousin Jane? That picture you posted of your new “sassy” haircut? You look like a dude, dude. Get thee to Supercuts ASAP and demand a re-do before you get hit on by a single mother at the next PTA meeting. TRUST me.)
Now, it’s obvious that your sister-in-law “Barb” is a few clowns shy of a circus. And if she’s that whacked all of the time, it’s no secret to the rest of the family who probably hate dealing with her, too. That’s why I think you’ve done the right thing in not friending her, and I advise you to stick to your convictions. You’ve drawn a line in the FB sand and you should let it remain until Mark Zuckerberg personally comes to your house and tells you to erase it.
And as far as censoring your humorous comments, I say “F*ck it.” You’re a grown woman, a tax-paying adult and you live in the United States of America! (Cue The Mouthy Housewives Philharmonic playing a jazzy version of “The Battle Hymn of the Republic.”) All of which means you can say whatever the hell you want, whenever the hell you want, on Facebook. Sure, she might get upset and make little comments and try to stir up trouble, but you know what? That’s her miserable reality and it certainly doesn’t have to be yours.
So my friend, I say log-in to Facebook, have fun and don’t worry about Ms. Psycho Pants one bit. And, uh, if you see Mr. Manilow on there, can you tell him I say “hi?” I don’t know why, but I just can’t smile without him.
Sincerely,
Wendi, TMH
13 Responses to “My Sister-In-Law’s In my Face(book)”
Comment by Familied-to-death.
I feel for ya sister. I’ve been on the receiving end of attacks by someone who called herself a friend and as if that’s not crappy enough, by two members of my extended families (2 of 3 daughter in laws) one of which I unfriended the minute she opened her yap. The other’s skatin on some mighty thin ice. I don’t know what the sam hell makes these folks think they’ve got any right bein judge and jury on anything I say, so I say F**k ‘em all to hell. I think I pretty much laid down the law on this all by sayin this year I have had enough of everybody jumpin in my sh*t on face book. I’m over 21, I pay my damn taxes and I done served Uncle Sam. I’ll say any damn thing I like and if someone don’t like what I said, go stuff yourself!
[Reply]
Comment by Desperate Dietwives.
How about just blocking her from FB? You go to your account’s privacy settings and block her, so she can’t find you on FB and can’t read what you write in anybody else’s.
This is what I did with a co-worker, and when she wondered how she could’nt find me I just answered “I don’t know, they must have made some bug at the last FB upgrading”.
Life’s full of shit already, why help others pile more on our lives?
[Reply]
Comment by Bean.
Block her, by all means. But really – if you put your life out there for people to see, you should probably expect them to comment. And with crazy people, it is asking too much to expect them to be civil.
Your other option, of course, is not to post status updates or incriminating things. It has been known to bite people on the a$$.
[Reply]
Comment by bitsy.
Excellent answer, Wendi!! I swear you just get funnier and funnier!
[Reply]
Comment by Lisa.
Instead of blocking her, how about you refrain from starting drama with snide comments? You made this latest mess yourself.
[Reply]
Comment by Plano Mom.
I don’t post anything meaningful or real on FB anymore. Too upsetting when my very (insert either extreme here) friends bash me for it.
[Reply]
Comment by JubanMama.
Yeah, I’ve got one of those. The thing is, he thinks that anything posted on FB is automatically public domain and he therefore has the right to say whatever he wants to me if I put something on FB. Sometimes I ignore him, but sometimes I get so fed up that I fight back. And then he backs down. And then he kisses my butt for a while, and then we start the whole cycle over again.
Here’s the thing. Facebook bullies are still bullies. Ignoring them doesn’t make them go away. They do what they do because people let them get away with it. When you stand up to them, just like bullies in real life, they tend to back down because deep down inside they are cowards.
[Reply]
Comment by Cheryl.
Wendi, I can’t believe you’re still waiting for Barry to notice you. I think you need to write a letter to TMH and get an opinion on what your next step needs to be.
FB? Pffft! Lurk. It’s funner.
[Reply]
Leave a Comment
The Mouthy Housewives respect everyone's opinion, however, if you're attacking other commentors, you will be deleted. And sent to your room until you can play nicely.
RSS Feed
Wendi Reply:
January 4th, 2011 at 7:36 am
Indeed.
[Reply]
marathonmom Reply:
January 4th, 2011 at 11:12 am
Yup, I have a whole list of blocked people including in-laws. I also have it set so I don’t come up in searches. And then if you are my FB friend, I have crazy shit on there like I work for the CIA and stuff.
[Reply]
GrandeMocha Reply:
January 4th, 2011 at 7:01 pm
All my inlaws are blocked too!