17 Nov
How To Be A Hot Mama For Less

Dear Mouthy Housewives,

I live in an upper-middle class suburb. Most of the women here are very fit, and spend the majority of their time playing tennis and shopping. They also have stylish clothes, highlighted hair, and lots of plastic surgery so they all look very young and hot. I’d love to look like them, but I can’t afford it. Any tips on how to keep up with the Joans on a budget?


Makeover Maddy


Dear Makeover Maddy,

I think you already know the first thing I’m going to tell you—-that old spiel about how you shouldn’t care too much about your outward appearance, that it’s your inner beauty that really counts, and that people should just love you for who you are, warts and all. But you know what? Let’s not and say we did.

The truth is that sometimes mama needs a little sumpin’ sumpin’ to make her feel good about herself.   However, despite what you may see on The Real Housewives of Skankville, that sumpin’ sumpin’ definitely doesn’t have to cost $10,000 and happen in a plastic surgeon’s office. Take a look at the discount beauty tips I found here, and here are some other ways you can look hot for less:

1. Diet and Exercise – Not as easy or as quick as a tummy tuck, but getting in shape can be practically free.   Take advantage of one of the many calorie counting websites available, then get active by playing tennis on a municipal court or by just going for walks every day.

2. Hair – Some people recommend student beauticians for discount hair styling, but that idea always gives me flashbacks to “Beauty School Dropout” and pink hair, so let’s not go there. Instead, go to the newest (and usually cheapest) stylist at a good salon for your cut, then try an at-home highlight kit from the drugstore. (Click on the video to see how to do it the right way.)

3. Clothes – If your neighborhood is anything like mine, the women’s daily uniform is usually designer denim, a cute top, and nice shoes. Spend your money on one good pair of jeans and a pair of shoes at someplace like Nordstrom Rack, then wear them with cute tops from Target. Also, invest in a push-up bra that fits and you’ll look as perky as someone with a boob job.

4. Skin – Sunscreen, self-tanner and moisturizer can do wonders to keep you looking youthful, and so can many of the low-priced cosmetic lines in the drugstore. Also, many day spas offer discounts on facials during their slow weekday times, so take advantage of that. As far as Botox goes, it’s up to you whether or not you think it’s worth the money to look like Nicole Kidman in a windstorm.

So that’s it, Maddy. Try one or all of these tips and you’ll look more like those hotties in your neighborhood in no time. And if you don’t, I wouldn’t worry about it too much because it’s really what’s on the inside that counts.

Yeah, I said it.


Wendi, TMH

5 Responses to “How To Be A Hot Mama For Less”


Comment by sophiecls.

Another tip: Some of the drugstore makeup brands are made by the same companies as the department store brands. I read “Beauty Confidential” by Nadine Haobsh, and she mentions a few drugstore brands to try, as well as tips on where it’s worth it to spend your money.

For clothes, you might try checking out thrift stores and consignment stores in wealthy neighborhoods for like-new name brands at a good price. You might find staples (like jeans and basic tops) there and look for trendier, one-season pieces at places like Target.

For skin and haircare and beauty treatments, look online for natural, DIY recipies. There’s a lot of spa-quality products like sugar scrubs, avocado hair masks and moisturizing honey masks you can make with stuff you already have in your kitchen.


Comment by suburbancorrespondent.

Good advice. Let me add that an expensive haircut is the best-spent money – in upper-middle class neighborhoods, like mine, that’s what separates the well-kept-looking from the frumps. You can find stylish jeans at Kohl’s, for heaven’s sakes. I get mine for 20 dollars on sale. Good shoes are key and are harder to skimp on. Thrift stores in these neighborhoods are good places to go – Lands End, Eddie Bauer, Ann Taylor – they’re all there. My red wool Talbots dress coat? 8 dollars, from a local synagogue rummage sale. It makes me feel like a million bucks.


Comment by Roshni.

You couldn’t have asked the question at a better time as we have so many HUGE sales coming up, you’re sure to snag something trendy! I agree with sophiecls, the best face and hair packs are the ones from your kitchen! After all, if a leading brand advertises that it uses avocado in its face mask, why not just apply mashed avocado?!


Comment by mom, again.

one of the main things I’ve found with attempting to thrift shop myself to style fashion: lose the weight. There is more available in smaller sizes new, & that carries through into what’s in thrifts. esp higher end brands and shops in the ‘good’ neighborhoods.

my best thrift find? a pair of enzo angiolini shoes, with shoe trees, in my odd size (7 EEE) for $2, the standard womens shoe price at the Goodwill near me. I got them re-soled once, would have them still if I hadn’t waited too long to get them re-soled again.


Comment by We're On A Budget, Should Our Kids Be, Too? | The Mouthy Housewives.

[…] of all, I commend you for sucking it up and taking care of your finances in a responsible manner. If more people were like you, we wouldn’t have pawnshops bursting with flat screen TVs, diamond […]

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