26 Mar
STFU Parents Book Giveaway!

It’s time for a STFU Parents book giveaway!

stfuparents

That’s right, we’re giving one lucky reader a brand-new, sparkly copy of Blair Koenig’s new book- STFU Parents: The Jaw-Dropping, Self-Indulgent, and Occasionally Rage-Inducing World of Parent Overshare.

What? Not familiar with that world?

It’s the world in which parents, commonly new parents, feel that whatever their children are doing is social media-worthy and Facebook status updatable.

Everything from a baby’s bowel movements, the size of their genitalia, to humblebrags about how intelligent the tykes are, these oversharing parents are out of control (and often, it seems, semi-literate.) And because it’s apparently impossible to stop them, and who the hell wants to join them, we just need to sit back and laugh.

Because we’ve all been there. We’ve all been subjected to friends/co-workers/parolees who overshare. We remember how in the very ancient time before Facebook, one of our friends told us about her baby’s bowel movement and the uncanny way that it changed from meconium to stool. And we remember thinking, “Hey! Let’s not be having this conversation!”

And we bet we’re not alone! So leave us a comment about an overshare that you either overheard or (gasp!) participated in, and we’ll pick a random winner on April 2nd!

Good luck!

Now we have to check our baby’s diaper. You never know what surprise could be waiting for us!

60 Responses to “STFU Parents Book Giveaway!”

03.26.13#1

Comment by Rain71284.

An overshare I keep overhearing at work is from a co-worker who is going through counseling. It’s a touchy subject, but he should really make the calls regarding his mental health – home to mommy – on his own time. Awk-ward!

03.26.13#2

Comment by QuackQuack.

The unintentional overshare: We had a temp at work for a few weeks. One day she had to make a personal phone call, which is allowed at my office. She called her doctor and then got into a very loud argument that she DIDN’T have gonorrhea and that the doctor was wrong. It lasted for about 10 minutes. HR had to explain to her later exactly why this was inappropriate.

03.26.13#3

Comment by Amy - Funny is Family.

I just scrolled through my Facebook page to find a recent overshare, and I couldn’t find one. Does that mean I’m the oversharer?! Nah. Couldn’t be.

03.26.13#4

Comment by BecW.

I have a family member who writes 50 Shades-esque status updates about her husband quite regularly on FB. She also sprinkles her feed with graphic updates on her toddler’s potty training. I want to hide her from my feed, but it’s like a train wreck; I can’t look away.

03.26.13#5

Comment by lucy_inthessky.

I have an acquaintance who has broken multiple oversharing rules.
1. She named her kids “Kahlibur” and “Aycesuh”.
2. She made facebooks for each of them and tags them in all of her statuses and pictures.
3. She documents EVERYTHING they do, including blurry pictures in which you can’t see what’s actually happening.
4. (the worst) She took and posted daily pictures of their hand/foot/mouth disease sores. (I almost barfed.)

I have another friend that posts pictures of full shopping carts around the holidays and shares how much she spent on her son for the upcoming holiday. Once, it was $700 for a one year old. (WTF)

Anytime I would say something about a kid being really terrible out in public, the latter acquaintance would say something like, “Oh just wait until after you have a kid, you’re so judgmental.” After I had a kid, it was, “Oh, just wait until she’s older, you’re so judgmental.” I’m also a teacher in a low income, high crime area, so I do know a thing or two about discipline and behavior for a large group of students.

I have about a million more. They are terrible.

Grotesque Reply:

I think you win, dude.

RubberDuckie Reply:

This should definitely win, they cover all the best STFUparents categories: yoonique names, Gross-out overshares, MommyJacking, and Spoiled Brats.

lucy_inthessky Reply:

I know, right! Thanks!

lucy_inthessky Reply:

haha, thanks. I am happy it might do some good, instead of just making me angry or grossed out!

03.26.13#6

Comment by aussiegirl1584.

The most recent overshare I’ve read:
:Well, we’ve hit an all new disgusting level with Paige tonight. She had a poop accident, stuck her dang hand in it and ate it. I was feeding Grace apples, Travis was cooking and she announced “yuck. My poopie doesn’t taste very good.” I’ve never been so disgusted in my freaking life. I seriously cannot handle it tonight. OMG.”

SHE can’t handle it? I can’t handle it.

nonparentl_butlotsoffriendsw/em Reply:

Oh my! It’s one thing to know your child did that & ya can’t handle it but it’s taking it to a whole new level to share it with everyone in Facebook land you’re friends with. So gross!

03.26.13#7

Comment by Angela S.

I can’t think of a parental overshare right now, but I do not care for it when people overshare about their health concerns! Thanks for the chance to win.

03.26.13#8

Comment by Stefanie.

A friend on FB posts at least one quote a day from her 3 yr old.. exactly how the 3yr old pronounces things: “Where’s Wegas? I go home with you!”

I get it, your kid says the cutest things… just like every other 3yr old that ever walked the earth.

03.26.13#9

Comment by Lana78.

I have a friend that I’ve known since childhood who posted an album of her entire home water birth. Complete with photos of her completely nude other than a bikini top with her husband in the nasty water with her, bloody water, bloody baby, placenta, umbilical cord, gaping vagina with the baby’s head poking through… Seriously she had her mother taking photos of this entire birthing process which traumatized the hell out of me despite the fact I’ve had 2 babies of my own.

We also all received daily updates about things like “the babies umbilical cord fell off today. Isn’t it cute? This is going in the baby book for sure.” and countless updates about the babies projectile vomiting due to acid reflux.

I really wanted to submit her stuff to STFU parents but because I’ve known her most of my life I decided to ask facebook (secretly)to remove her nasty pictures. I then laughed hysterically (secretly) as she updated her status with a rant about “The asshole who reported her beautiful pictures who ‘OBVIOUSLY’ IS NOT A MOTHER since they can’t appreciate the beauty of her bringing a life into the world.” Since obviously I can’t “appreciate it” unless I have a photo spread of everything that happened showing in my facebook feed. smh

03.26.13#10

Comment by Anna.

Not sure if this counts as overshare, but I am sick (ha ha) of constant illness updates from my friends about their kids. It’s bad enough if an adult whines incessantly about being sick, I don’t need to know the medical reports from your whole family unless the child is indeed life-threateningly ill. One post about a head cold is fine. Hourly updates – no. Just no.

03.26.13#11

Comment by TheJackieB.

a friend of mine overshared about her daughter’s first period, even asked me to send her kid a welcome to womanhood gift!

Keryn Reply:

OH. NO.

03.26.13#12

Comment by Katy.

An fb friend posted that she was out and about with her youngest who was still in diapers. The child needed a change but she had forgotten to bring extras. “What was a cloth diapering mom to do?” So the place she was at had all these used baby clothes they were giving away so she just grabbed some and made a diaper for her child. She thought this was perfectly reasonable and justified. And who else could possibly need these clothes?

03.26.13#13

Comment by Beth1988.

I have a woman on my facebook friends who I knew in High school, and she is one of those people who posts numerous pictures of her cats and gives a detailed description of what she is making for dinner each night. She just had a new baby and although it is less than a month old, the photo folder of just that baby is over 400 pictures! And some of those pictures are of disgusting dirty diapers and spit ups with cutesie captions like ‘Look what silly baby X did to her shirt! My pretty girl!’ It is horrifying!

03.26.13#14

Comment by Lana78.

oh and one more this one is not an “over-share” really but just a funny thing I witnessed from a crazy mom friend the other day. In our city they recently changed a rule about the age which a kid can start school. It used to be that 4 yr olds could start kindergarten if they turned 5 before November of that school yr, well now you have to wait until your kid is 5.

So anyway, a friend of mines kid just turned one at Christmas (which means in 4 yrs he will have missed the kindergarten deadline by one month and will have to wait til the following September) and she goes into an entire rant about how “this is totally unfair because Alex (the one year old) can already say some words, and he can count (She posted a video of him repeating the number ONE just barely understandable), and he should not have to wait until he is 5 because he is totally ready for school.”

She then got mad at me after I commented and said “maybe you should worry about kindergarten after he learns to walk without falling and stops shitting his pants.(and knowing how to talk would help too)”

03.26.13#15

Comment by LP.

My worst one actually got posted to STFU Parents… my college “friend” posted a video of her daughter on the toilet crying about her constipation. I didn’t watch it (thank God) but it sounded like mom & dad were laughing about it in the background. These are obviously horrible disturbed people.

03.26.13#16

Comment by Wendi.

Thanks to Instagram, I see a certain mommy blogger’s kids more often than I see my own kids.

03.26.13#17

Comment by Annie.

I wanted to enter but #9 (the water birth) should get the book. I am mortified by even reading that.

I overshared about my kids plagiocephaly (flat head) to EVERYONE I met. Strangers. I asked them if they thought he had a flat head and then hated them when they said he did (he did/does).

My friend also posted a facebook pic of his kid’s first poop on the toilet. A little piece of me died that day.

03.26.13#18

Comment by dusty earth mother.

I’m still laughing about the water birth pictures. Lord help us all.

Lana78 Reply:

You’re only laughing because you did not see it. Seriously, if I had not already had my children I would have been scarred for life.

The worst part is she is one of those people who adds random strangers to her facebook who happen to play games she plays. So it was essentially like she invited 500 people she does not know to come to her house and witness the birth of her child. strange…

03.26.13#19

Comment by Michelle.

When I was pregnant, I lost my mind completely and shared every single detail with everyone on my contact list. I even remember using the word cervix several time. I’m still mortified about how much I told people. I’m surprised any of them are still my friends. Luckily after she was born, my common sense returned and I’ve stepped away from the overshare tendency.

Heather E Reply:

Well hopefully that mean there’s hope for the rest of the over-sharers!

03.26.13#20

Comment by Holly.

My cousin posted a photo on FB of her son’s bright pink poo after he ate a ton of pink cake frosting. Can I share the photo here? It’s pretty amazing! (Barf)

RubberDuckie Reply:

Send it to STFUparents!! That’s what it’s all about. stfuparentsblog@gmail.com

03.26.13#21

Comment by Damm.

I have a friend who went with fertility treatments. Without fail during group get togethers over dinner we would all be treated to a play by play of her personal medical updates. Such as coming back from a bathroom trip and announcing “Well, that was my last pill!” and periodic period status.

03.26.13#22

Comment by Karen.

IT WAS ME!! My son climbed into the toilet and instead of fishing him out immediately, I went and got my camera. And posted the pic on Facebook. In my defense: we were at my mom’s house and there has never been a cleaner toilet on the entire planet.

I didn’t make it on to STFU, Parents. Sigh, Fameis always a step away…

03.26.13#23

Comment by Laura.

How about the alcoholic mom who is SO EXCITED to talk about drinking instead of her kids… or that her breastfeeding is WAAAAAAAY BETTER than anyone else’s experience. And if you can’t breastfeed, she’s going to tell you how your baby will be malnourished and mentally retarded.

I guess I’ll have a mentally retarded and malnourished baby because I can’t breastfeed. Yeah, I could go on.

Lana78 Reply:

I have one of those, she will post a side by side picture of her kids sleeping along with a can of some cheap beer or 4loco and write “my prince and princess are sleeping now it’s mommy time. #proudmomma #lovemykids #TimeToGetFuckedUp”

Laura Reply:

I almost typed, “SO GLAD IT ISN’T JUST ME!” but really…? Should we be happy about that? I’m all for having a drink, but um, really? To this extent? No thanks.

Lana78 Reply:

Nope, not just you. lol Here is just a small sampling. (BTW this person is NOT my friend. She has kids with my husband’s second cousin and I keep her around on my facebook for the entertainment value.)

1)http://prntscr.com/xxell

2)http://prntscr.com/xxeq0

03.26.13#24

Comment by Dorothy.

I have a 2month old, a 3 year old, and a 10 year old. My 3 year old we are still in the process of potty training. He will peepee on the potty but refuses to poop on it! My 2 month old has been sick so her poop hasn’t been solid. The other day (at the same time) my son pooped on the potty and my daught’s poop was solid! I was so excited I texted everyone in my phone (including my previous boss! oops!). LOL

03.26.13#25

Comment by Christen.

When I was in high school I had a teacher who shared every detail of her sons potty training with us. Including pictures of him sitting on his ” big boy potty” lol!

03.26.13#26

Comment by Lana78.

If my water birth story is not win worthy I would like to submit my 5 yr old daughter as an oversharer. She has her own laptop (purchased by my crazy sister because I would never buy a 5yr old a laptop)and a facebook page where she is only friends with my husband and I, her grandparents,aunts,and cousins, etc. (because they live in other cities and states than us).

A few weeks ago I had to go into her account and delete a status update she wrote that said “Hey gwamma I jus pooped a roket.” (Hey grandma, I just pooped a rocket.) I then had to explain to her that no one needs to know when she poops and that we especially do not write about that kind of thing on the internet.

03.26.13#27

Comment by Cait.

I’m a nanny. There are 3 of them. Take your pick. The humblebrag that really pisses me off the most is when mom and dad go on and on and on (and on and on…) about how smart their oldest is. She figured out all by herself how to spell her name in sign language (after the nanny spent a week teaching her) and how to say “Wheels on the bus in Danish please” in Danish (after the nanny spent a week teaching her), etc. Sometimes, dear parents, there are people out there teaching this crap to your kids…

03.26.13#28

Comment by Lizzie.

My cousin will not stop sharing her four-year-old’s potty training updates on Facebook. She says she needs to do it so all the grandparents can hear about it but 1. why do they need to know everything about this (way too old) kid’s potty training and 2. apparently she’s never heard of email.

03.26.13#29

Comment by ginnby.

I seem to have a ton of oversharers on my fb feed! My sister felt it necessary to post videos of her c-section when she had her first one. I really didn’t need to see her insides! I’m scarred for life. Now that she pregnant for her second, she posted a pic of her positive pregnancy test soaked in piss to tell everyone. She also like to talk to her unborn baby via facebook status updates. “Good morning little peanut, thanks for not kicking me too much last night! Can’t wait to meet you!” (gag me)

One of my highschool friends is a stay at home mom and a car seat activist (I didn’t know this existed til seeing her posts)She updates at least once a day with “fun facts” about proper car seat installation. I posted a picture of my daughter in her car seat a while ago and she went into a RANT because she was in the front seat including terms like, “If you loved your daughter you would…” (We were in a pick up truck with no back seat and the passenger airbag was turned off, even my pediatrician said she was perfectly safe and legal.)

My cousin is one of those “poop oversharers” posting pictures and commentaries of her 3 daughters when they are weird colors, shapes, etc. or when they are potty training. I think the worst was the bath tub poops!

I feel like my entire FB feed is taken over by crazy parents!

Heather E Reply:

So car seat activism is a thing and not just my friend, huh? My friend also shares daily pics of baby-wearing and breastfeeding tips. I know this is all good information, but it comes off as really condescending!

LJ Reply:

I have a friend who does the daily car seat thing too. UGH!
She also posts daily about autism (both of her kids have) and pit bulls.

Mom of 4 Luds Reply:

Interesting combination.

03.26.13#30

Comment by eliz137.

A childhood friend is a total oversharer. Pictures of her kids sitting on the toilet, comments about how great they’re doing etc. No one needs to see or hear about that!

03.26.13#31

Comment by HellTygr.

My story is my husband’s overshare. We were telling my birthstory to a pair of expecting parents… all the usual stuff about how class and reality are miles apart. I stopped the story at the birth of my daughter. DH, on the other hand, felt it necessary to continue on about delivering the placenta, in plenty of vivid detail. These were friends we were talking to, but not close friends. 3 out of 4 of us in the room were horrified.

03.26.13#32

Comment by Christina F..

a friend who regularly shares her child’s potty training status, including that he finally went poop in the potty. joy.

03.26.13#33

Comment by Cecilia.

Have a friend who is constantly posting about all the things her kid is able to do. He’s a month old!

03.26.13#34

Comment by The Flying Chalupa.

Anything with “STFU” in the title, I will most likely enjoy. And have I told you where my son wipes his boogers? Sit on down!
xo

03.26.13#35

Comment by MaryLynn.

I have one guy who won’t shut up about his wife’s vagina! Granted she’s expecting but we don’t need detailed images of what’s going on inside her uterus!

03.26.13#36

Comment by Tara.

One friend on Facebook updates throughout the day as to what her child is eating. Every morning I have to wake up to something along the lines of, “So proud of X, he ate all of his yogurt and grapes this morning.” The same is said for breakfast and dinner. Why wouldn’t he be eating and why is she still so surprised and thankful for this? This kid does not look malnourished! Drives me nuts.

03.26.13#37

Comment by Kat.

I was guilty of some oversharing… While my husband was deployed to afghanistan he was missing alot of our sons firsts, first steps, which i recorded and posted on facebook, first birthday, also on facebook, first potty successes, yes also on facebook. I had about 15 pics of my son using the potty, well actually just the results of him sitting on it, the pee, the pee with a teeny poop in it, the pee with a little log of poop… and the one that made most of my friends and family (except my mother who loves bathroom humor) yell at me and tell me to take it down… this was a picture of my sons potty, with what looked like an octopus made of poop, no lie, I was so shocked with the amount and the shape of his poop that I immediately uploaded the picture straight from my phone with the caption, “it looks like an octopus, right?”. This resulted in a number of my husbands family in berating me and telling me that they don’t want to see this sort of stuff… so after a couple weeks I took it down, much to my mothers distress, she apparently loved showing the picture to everyone she knew to get a good laugh. I promised all my friends I would never post any more poop… but looking at my albums can still be dangerous, pics of my husband and son together with my son covering my husbands important bits… pics my husband took of me breastfeeding my son, passed out breastfeeding him… his first bath… baby naked trying to sit in a dog dish cuz he thinks it is a pool, him naked in a small clear plastic storage bin that is practically as good as a pool, every ultrasound i ever had, including a nice close up of us finding it was a him, complete with arrow and labeling, pics from my c-section… OMG, I never realized how much of an oversharer I was!!! I gotta go take down some pictures…

03.26.13#38

Comment by rebecca.

Just today a friend posted on facebook about his son’s horrible farts.

Poor kid.

03.26.13#39

Comment by Mommy81320.

A Facebook friend of mine posted a series of pictures of her (significantly overweight and not good-looking) husband, dressed in a shirt, tie, and pants, cavorting in their kids’ backyard wading pool with the sprinkler. There were about sixteen poses of him in various “sexy” positions. I can’t believe she even took the pictures, much less posted them all on facebook.

03.27.13#40

Comment by Cassi O..

One of my friends on fb likes to post tons of pics of her “catching” her daughter picking her nose…does she not realize her daughter will grow up and be mortified? There is also a picture of her going poop on the potty for the first time.

03.27.13#41

Comment by Kay A.

My sorority sister put photos of her birth on Facebook. The worst photo was a close up of her child crowning and she was pooping at the same time. Definitely an over share.

Mona Reply:

Holy f…! Win.
I didn’t even witness the birth of my own children. “Would you like a mirror to watch?”. Uh, I’ll stick with just *feeling* it and leave the retina scarring for my husband.

03.27.13#42

Comment by Hip-Baby Mama.

I have a friend who randomly texted her baby’s poop-photo to everyone in her phone. I still don’t understand why people take photos of bodily fluids. Ick!

03.30.13#43

Comment by Mom of 4 Luds.

This was in pre-FB days, but a family member used to send pictures of his new baby around via email. EVERY DAY. TO EVERYONE HE KNEW. MULTIPLE PICTURES. Yes, he was the first person on earth to ever have a child.

This book sounds like a riot.

04.01.13#44

Comment by Sandy Shoes.

“Sure is nice to wake up with (boyfriend’s name) in his bed… best Easter ever!”

It’s one thing to fornicate, but posting about it on Easter???

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