13 Jul
Just Desserts

Dear TMH,

We invited a friend to dinner on Saturday night and she said she’d bring dessert. Great! She showed up with two grocery bags and inside one of them was my all-time favorite dessert : a mini Wegmans Chocolate Cake. (Something she’s brought to my house many other times.) When I said, “Yum! My favorite!”, she looked at me and said, “Oh no, that’s for me, for tomorrow; I brought you vanilla cupcakes.” I don’t even like vanilla anything! WTF?

Then she said, “Can I put the cake in your fridge?” and at the end of the night, she took it home with her. Am I wrong to be upset? Or is that weird?!


Let Me Eat Cake, Dammit


Dear Let Me Eat Cake,

Well, my dear, it sounds as if you were the victim of what we in the business call “the old Bait ‘n Switch.” This is a maneuver I regularly pull on my husband by showing him page after page of delicious gourmet food in a fancy cookbook, then yelling, “Now, who’s ready for some Red Baron pizza and a Swanson’s Pot Pie? Dinner is served, baby!” The poor man falls for it every single time.

Now, the reason I do this isn’t because I’m trying to be sneaky; it’s simply because I have the kitchen skills of a near-sighted toddler and couldn’t cook anything gourmet even if Martha Stewart herself were chained to my oven yelling instructions to me through a megaphone. What can I say? My strengths lie elsewhere.

But why did your “friend” pull this little trick on you? Why did she tempt you with your favorite dessert, then suddenly switch it to bland vanilla cupcakes? Well, it could be one of two things:

Number one: she didn’t really think about what she was doing, and since you didn’t call her on it at the time, she still doesn’t realize that she hurt your feelings. Next time you see her, simply ask her about it. If she’s a true friend, you’ll most likely have a good laugh, and then she’ll never forget to bring your favorite cake again.

Or possibility number two: the chick’s a total whackjob. There’s a chance that she’s upset with you about something, and instead of telling you about it, she’s acting out in a rather passive-aggressive manner. (A manner that unfortunately involves the withholding of chocolate cake, which I’m pretty sure violates The Geneva Convention.) Again, the best solution is to just ask her about it and see what she says. If she claims she did nothing wrong and doesn’t understand why you’re upset by her rudeness, then she’s probably not someone you want to keep inviting over to your home.

But if you ever do have her over for dinner again, put her in charge of the napkins.

Good luck,

Wendi, TMH

SUMMER GIVEAWAY! The fabulous women over at Promom Couture are giving away one of their cool summer tanks to a lucky TMH reader. Simply leave a comment this week and we’ll put your name in the random drawing. How cute is this!?

Grateful_tank (2)

25 Responses to “Just Desserts”


Comment by Kay.

I’d never seen that site before, but already found a few things I’d love to order… ya know, if I didn’t mind having my electric or phone turned off for non payment 🙂
Instead, I’ll just cross my fingers and hope that I win 🙂


Comment by shelley.

Love the shirt.


Comment by lae.

Love it. I hope to win but will check out their site just in case


Comment by Sally.

That’s one of the best mom shirts I’ve seen.


Comment by Liz.

Great shirt, but WTH, woman? Who brings chocolate cake and doesn’t share?


Comment by The Laughing Idiot.

Next time she says she’ll bring dessert, just say, “Oh, great! I really love that chocolate cake.”

If she doesn’t bring it, it’s a flat-out snub and I’d find a new friend.

Just my opinion.

BTW – cute shirt! It wouldn’t hurt to wear it as a visual reminder that I love my children & cherish every minute of their lives even if they did just break my favorite vase.


Comment by Kim.

I don’t get why she didn’t just tell her friend she was mistaken in the first place – the chocolate cake for tonight and the vanilla for you tomorrow.

and this is a great shirt for me!

[WORDPRESS HASHCASH] The poster sent us ‘0 which is not a hashcash value.


Comment by Katie.

I wouldn’t have kept so quiet about the cake. Then again, Im a mouthy bitch and everyone knows it. Maybe that’s why everyone DOES bring me chocolate cake…

Cute ass shirt too. You should rig the drawing for me, I’m a soon to be first time mom. Doesn’t that make me special or some shit? 😉


Comment by s2sparksy.

The travesty of dangling that chocolate covered carrot. What a tool! Add extra vegetables to her plate next time.


Comment by Nicole.

I have to say, that’s pretty ballsy of her to bring cake and not share.

Personally, I’m not a big fan of cake, but if you replace “cake” with “ice cream” well, you know that thing about a momma bear and her cub?


Comment by Finn.

The part that bothered me the most was the fact that she clearly stopped at Wegman’s on the way to dinner. Honestly… did you invite her as you were putting dinner in the oven?


Comment by TeacherMommy.

I think it’s entirely possible that Let Me Eat Cake, Dammit could win a significant amount of cash in civil court–you know, for the emotional pain and suffering. Stock the jury with women and she’ll win before the closing arguments hit.

Then she can buy all the chocolate cake she wants. And, if she’s still feeling miffed, parade them by the offending “friend.”


Comment by jen415.

You should have stolen a piece while she was eating dinner.


Comment by Aludra.

You could talk to her if you want but I have a feeling that in a couple days it will seem silly to spite her for preserving her cake in your fridge during dinner. She DID bring you cupcakes and even if they were vanilla, she probably doesnt know you dislike it. Tell her to next time bring something chocolate, but I wouldn’t raise hell over the cake thing.

Sheesh, at least you can both eat chocolate. My good friend can’t stand chocolate so when she’s around we always have to find something else for dessert. She’s also lactose intolerant. And allergic to fruits. Yeah your friends are looking better all the time, eh?


Comment by Inna.

I think its pretty rude too. She should have bought two cakes, one to share and one to take home later. It would also have saved her time in thinking about what to bring to your house for dessert.


Comment by bex.

even though i don’t usually comment, i love this site and check it everyday! but taunt me with a fancy top and i’ll comment all day! pick me! pick me!


Comment by ellyn.

I think she is a whackjob. Who would do this to a friend? Even if she had planned on taking it home, when you mentioned it, she should have changed her plans. You did have her over for dinner after all.

Love the shirt.


Comment by Mirth.

I bet the friend would have left the cake if it had a fingerprint in it :). Honestly, who does $hit like that? Love the shirt.


Comment by christy.

I am not sure if I’m supposed to out myself here – but Wendi, thank you so much for answering my question, and thanks to all who commented…I’m too wimpy to call her out on it, but I can say that I’ll probably not have her bring dessert again. I’ll let her stick to appetizers – she always brings shrimp, which we love! 🙂


Comment by Katie.

Christy – don’t get your hopes up……..you said she used to always bring the chocolate cake too, and look what happened.

Next time, she’ll be leaving shrimp in your fridge “for later” while she serves you f*cking limp broccoli and some cheap store brand dip.

Or maybe that’s just my “the glass is half empty and I need to finish it before any one realizes how much I’ve had today” outlook on life.


Comment by Marinka, TMH.

I had a friend who I’d asked to bring dessert for the weekend when they visited us and she brought carrots to make carrot cake. WTF? I didn’t even know that any carrots had to be hurt in the creation of the carrot cake.

We still talk about it. And I still haven’t forgiven her.


Comment by Coco.

I would get over the desert thing. Most of us shouldn’t eat them anyway. Think of it as doing you a favor by helping you watch your caloric and fat intake.

Or next time…. if she pulls this again don’t say anything. Just take it out of the fridge and cut a big slice. And then Ooops.


Comment by mountainmom.

I absolutely love this site. I have laughed so hard I’ve cried. And I WANT that t shirt 🙂


Comment by heather.

If I was your “friend” and brought a cake that was for me, and saw you drooling over it…i totally would not ever say “oh, no. that is mine, you get these boring vanilla cupcakes, I will be putting MY food in your fridge and yeah thanks for having me over” i would totally let you have the thing and buy another on my way home, and give the cupcakes to my kiddos(they would not see the cake, and would love me forever for getting them surprise-cupcakes-for-no-reason) and eat the cake after they went to sleep.
but that is just me…and what the hell kind of super delicious cake is this??? it is causing all kinds of problems…


Comment by tammigirl.

The shirt is adorable.

If one of my ‘friends’ put a chocolate cake in my frige I would sneak it down to the fridge in the basement and tell her my fridge eats chocolate cakes like my dryer eats socks.

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