This post is sponsored by Hillshire Farm.
Are you one of the lucky people going to BlogHer ’11 in San Diego this week? You are? Then you probably already know that whether this is your first blogging conference or your 10th, being surrounded by so many bloggers can be overwhelming. Fortunately, you have the Mouthy Housewives to help you prepare.
Here are our exclusive tips to having a great time at BlogHer—trust us, you’re not going to get advice like this from anyone else:
Wake up in the hotel room and enjoy the fact that you will not have to clean it.
Have a few bloggers that you’d like to meet and then introduce yourself. Preferably while giving them a pastry.
Practice giving out your business cards in front of a mirror. This doesn’t come naturally to most people.
If you’re too shy to approach new people, hire a representative to network on your behalf so you can hide in your room and order room service wine by the bottle. (Make sure the representative looks just like you, but 10 years younger and/or 10 ounces lighter.)
Don’t let anyone make you feel silly for taking advantage of free stuff. Unless you’re going crazy over those dishwasher soap samples because, come on. That’s just embarrassing and desperate.
Dress to impress! We recommend a floor-length ball gown or tuxedo. This is your professional brand on the line, after all. You also can’t go wrong with an all-leather look.
Confused about which panel to attend? Just go to the room where you hear laughter, not snoring, coming from the audience. And remember, there are no dumb questions unless they’re about your cat. Or pastrami sandwiches.
Going to one of the wild BlogHer parties? Then plan on gettin’ down wif yo bad self. In other words, get out of the corner and start dancing. Trust us, there’s no way you’ll be the worst one on the floor. And if you are, you’ll get lots of free publicity for your brand when someone posts you on YouTube with the title, “Worst Dancer at BlogHer San Diego.”
Do not attempt to organize a Beliebers cocktail party.
Bring something to hand out at BlogHer that has your web address on it so people can remember your blog. We recommend lawn chairs or miniature ponies.
During the sessions, make sure to tweet every six or seven minutes. If you can’t think of anything clever and funny to say, pretend you’re reading an important email from your imaginary literary agent.
Do not drink so much that you wake up in the middle of the night, fully clothed, spooning your roommate who you just met the day before.
Remember the Geek Bar is not a place to meet hot accountants or order a martini.
If you’ve brought your Valium remember it’s important to share. This does not mean, however, that you can’t charge a little something for your “troubles.” (Unless it’s one of us, then it’s very very important to share.)
Bring a purse large enough to accommodate a box of Franzia and a bag of Cheetos. You will get thirsty and hungry. Always be prepared.
To make the best impression possible have a few memorized lyrics on hand, say, from a new Eminem song. Add a grill and some dope hand gestures for extra emphasis.
If you find that you have inadvertently tucked your skirt into your underwear, don’t worry, just own it. And if possible, have a jam box handy with a mix of “Doin’ The Butt”
Visit the Hillshire Farm Booth! Stop by booth #100 for a chance to meet “Bridesmaids” comedienne Wendi McLendon-Covey while dining in style at the only eatery at BlogHer ’11!
Take a seat at the So Good Bistro and place an order off of the Hillshire Farm menu featuring a variety of delicious dishes made using products including slow roasted lean cuts of lunchmeat and perfectly seasoned smoked sausage. Snag an exclusive for your blog and be among the first to sample new and tasty products from the kitchens of Hillshire Farm, debuting at BlogHer! Bring the live action of BlogHer straight to your blog by hopping into the Hillshire Farm video booth to create a digital recording that can be uploaded directly to your site.
Hillshire Farm wants you to share the day’s experience with us and your fans while revealing that little something extra you get when you create a great meal.
The booth is open: August 4 (6-8 pm), August 5 (8 am to 6 pm), August 6 (8 am to 6 pm)
See Wendi at the Hilllshire booth:
- Friday: 10:00 – 10:30 am (appearance), 10:30 – 11:30 am, autograph signing (2:45 pm to 4 pm)
- Saturday: 10:00 – 10:30 am (appearance), 10:30 – 11:30 am, autograph signing (1:30 pm to 2:45 pm)
Thank you to Hillshire Farm for sponsoring this post!