The Mouthy Housewives Tip of the Week!
TRICK OR TREAT? HOW ABOUT BOTH?!
Still searching for a last minute Halloween costume for yourself?
Tired of the usual “sexy” crap like nurses and kittens?
Well, why not shake things up a bit this year and show the world how slutty you can be without even trying!
For example:
SEXY BUTT WIPER: Unbutton your blouse and carry a box of wet wipes!
SEXY EXHAUSTED MOTHER: Unbutton your blouse and put glitter on your dark circles!
SEXY DISHWASHER: Unbutton your blouse and spank people with your wet Playtex gloves!
SEXY WINO: Unbutton your blouse and drink enough wine so that even your weird neighbor Gary looks hot!
SEXY WEIGHT WATCHER: Unbutton your blouse and tell everyone the caloric content of each piece of candy!
SEXY PMSer: Unbutton your blouse, retain water and punch people in the face until they give you chocolate!
So you see, ladies, with a little imagination, a little unbuttoning and a whole lot of “Oh, who the f*ck cares, just give me the stupid candy bars and let me cry in my closet by myself people,” Halloween can be the sexiest—and scariest—holiday of all!
HAPPY HALLOWEEN!
Comment by Diane.
I was thinking of Sexy Mouthy Housewife this year. Dirty bathrobe, ratty slippers, hair in rollers with perfectly manicured toes and nails holding a ginormous cocktail. Nothing on under the robe of course. An attitude to match. But people will only ask – Diane – where’s your costume?