10 Nov
Rawr! Am I A Cougar?

Dear Mouthy Housewives,

I’m a 35-year old single mom of two kids. I lived above a cute guy in an apartment complex and after 8 months of saying hello in the hall, we went out on a date, hit it off, and have been in an involved relationship since June.

Oh, what’s that you say? How old is he? Dadgummit he’s 25. TWENTY-FIVE! Does that REALLY make me a Cougar? I didn’t chase after him just cause he’s a fine young thang. So clear this up for me: what really defines a Cougar, and should we keep on dating considering we have such a great time together, and therefore join the ranks of Mariah and Nick, and Demi and Ashton?!


Ready to Pounce In Raleigh


Dear Ready to Pounce,

Well, Kitty, the first thing we need to do in order to answer your question is to define the term “Cougar.” According to Wikipedia, a Cougar is either a “large, solitary cat” or “a woman over 40 who sexually pursues younger men.” So I guess that means if you’re licking yourself, you’re the feline kind of Cougar. But if some young buck is licking you, you’re the really, really happy kind of Cougar. Meow.

But from what I’ve heard, what really makes someone a Cougar is if they’re an attractive older woman who hunts the “vulnerable prey” of younger men. The kind of woman who’s Botoxed within an inch of her life, has a lot of cash, and who feels that she deserves a little “boy toy” to give her foot massages and peel her grapes. And honestly, if that’s what makes a woman happy in her tough pre-menopausal years, who are we point fingers at her and call her “Madonna”? After all, men have been dating younger women for years and nobody calls them by animal names. (Well, besides “Jackass.”)

Now in your case, it doesn’t sound like Mr. 25 year-old was just sitting quietly in a meadow smelling the flowers when BAM! you pounced on him with your cat claws and carried him back to your lair. So if you two enjoy each other, and your kids like him, who cares what people think?   Go ahead and let them call you “Cougar” to your face. Because once they see that hot 25-year old man on your arm, they’re probably calling you “one lucky bee-yotch” behind your back.


Wendi, TMH


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11 Responses to “Rawr! Am I A Cougar?”


Comment by Marinka,TMH.

I always thought that Cougar was a huge compliment. Well, more so than Cow.


Comment by the mama bird diaries.

I would never turn down the chance to date a hot 25 year-old other than that unfortunate “I’m married” thing.

Go for it girl. We’ll all be jealous.


Comment by Noah.

Great Post. If hey diggs you then run with it…Could get complicated later but I am sure it will be lots of fun!


Comment by toywithme.

Great advice Wendy. I could only hope to dig my claws into something young and
sexy 😉

I’ve heard of a few terms for the male on the prowl for a “trophy wife”. There is the Manther or my fave the Silver Fox. Basically because he is more sly.

Also, here’s an article I posted recently regarding Cougars and Milfs that might be helpful to your reader.
There are lots of comments that might answer some of your questions.


Comment by maritimegypsy.

There’s a scene in Accidentally On Purpose where she’s about to go home with the young guy and asks her bff “Is this a desperate act or empowering?” her friend has only one question “is he over 18?”…yes… EMPOWERING!


Comment by GrandeMocha.

I think we need to see a picture of him before we decide. Shirtless, if possible.


Comment by minor catastrophes.

I asked a young, handsome, twenty-something intern I work with about what makes one a cougar, and he said, “Cougar is a state of mind.”

Hmmm. I say Go Girl. Just keep your expectations realistic.


Comment by perfectlyflawedmommy.

What ever happened to age is only a number? …..or do only young women dating older men say that?….


Comment by D-I-V-O-R-C-E spells PARTY TIME! | The Mouthy Housewives.

[…] Do not, under any circumstances, call her a Cougar, a Puma or a Mountain Snow Leopard because it will only hurt her feelings. Unless, of course, […]


Comment by Sass Runs in Packs | Lela Davidson.

[…] Mouthy Housewives (this one is actually Wendi too) gives us the definition of a Cougar. Finally. Now that I’m forty, it’s very important information for me […]


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