Dear Mouthy Housewives,
I’m a 35-year old single mom of two kids. I lived above a cute guy in an apartment complex and after 8 months of saying hello in the hall, we went out on a date, hit it off, and have been in an involved relationship since June.
Oh, what’s that you say? How old is he? Dadgummit he’s 25. TWENTY-FIVE! Does that REALLY make me a Cougar? I didn’t chase after him just cause he’s a fine young thang. So clear this up for me: what really defines a Cougar, and should we keep on dating considering we have such a great time together, and therefore join the ranks of Mariah and Nick, and Demi and Ashton?!
Ready to Pounce In Raleigh
Dear Ready to Pounce,
Well, Kitty, the first thing we need to do in order to answer your question is to define the term “Cougar.” According to Wikipedia, a Cougar is either a “large, solitary cat” or “a woman over 40 who sexually pursues younger men.” So I guess that means if you’re licking yourself, you’re the feline kind of Cougar. But if some young buck is licking you, you’re the really, really happy kind of Cougar. Meow.
But from what I’ve heard, what really makes someone a Cougar is if they’re an attractive older woman who hunts the “vulnerable prey” of younger men. The kind of woman who’s Botoxed within an inch of her life, has a lot of cash, and who feels that she deserves a little “boy toy” to give her foot massages and peel her grapes. And honestly, if that’s what makes a woman happy in her tough pre-menopausal years, who are we point fingers at her and call her “Madonna”? After all, men have been dating younger women for years and nobody calls them by animal names. (Well, besides “Jackass.”)
Now in your case, it doesn’t sound like Mr. 25 year-old was just sitting quietly in a meadow smelling the flowers when BAM! you pounced on him with your cat claws and carried him back to your lair. So if you two enjoy each other, and your kids like him, who cares what people think? Go ahead and let them call you “Cougar” to your face. Because once they see that hot 25-year old man on your arm, they’re probably calling you “one lucky bee-yotch” behind your back.
Have you entered our Minted holiday card giveaway? Hurry!