05 Apr
I Don’t Poop in Your House So Please Don’t Let Your Dog Poop in My Yard

Dear Mouthy Housewives,

Someone is letting their dog poop in our yard. We don’t have dogs for a reason and this is one of them. Well, now I have no idea which dog this poop is coming from since we have numerous people who walk their dogs through our side yard to get to a trail that runs along the back of our property. We also have neighbors that have dogs.

I’ve contemplated putting up cameras to find out who the “poopetrator” is, but I have decided not to due to the cost of the camera equipment.  I’ve already flung the poop in our neighbors yard thinking he’d get the message if it’s his dog but the poop keeps on reappearing.

What should we do?


The Grass is Not Greener in My Yard Because It’s Covered in Crap.


Dear the Grass is Not Greener,

At first, I thought you should immediately patent the word “poopetrator” but apparently there are others who have already coined the term.  Urban Dictionary has brought so much enlightenment to all of our lives.

This would obviously be a whole lot simpler if you knew who was responsible. But I’m guessing with the high volume of dog traffic in your yard, more than one pooch is to blame anyway.

I agree that installing cameras is way too expensive unless you can don some kind of cheesy wig, get yourself an orange tan, develop a drinking problem and land yourself your own reality show. If that sounds like too much to take on, I would advise some well placed signs in your yard…

Maybe something like this…

Or this…

Or even this…

Or maybe you just need this one…

That’s a whole lot cheaper than actually installing cameras or maintaining the perfect orange day glow spray tan.

You don’t have to litter your yard with these signs. Many sites sell small, tasteful ones if you’re ones of those people who, for example, prefers not to have a dog’s ass as your official yard logo.  The idea is just to remind people that your yard is private property, not an animal outhouse.


Kelcey, TMH

14 Responses to “I Don’t Poop in Your House So Please Don’t Let Your Dog Poop in My Yard”


Comment by Desperate Dietwives.

I can fully understand your feelings, however there is one disturbing element in your letter: “I’ve already flung the poop in our neighbors yard thinking he’d get the message if it’s his dog but the poop keeps on reappearing”.

Flinging dog poop in other people’s yard “just in case” the poopetrator is their dog when admittedly there is a heavy dog traffic in your yard suggests less than friendly relationships.

Could this poop affair be a sign of neighbourhood issues? Could it just be that someone has it in for you and is sending you a crappy message?
Of course this is not admissible in a civilized Country, but neither is flinging poop in your neighbour’s yard…

sisterfunkhaus Reply:

I was wondering the same thing. I kind of feel like maybe someone who would throw poop in someone else’s yard, and who contemplates installing cameras over dog poop in the yard could potentially be a target of others. Behavior like that suggests overreaction and possibly a less than neighborly attitude. Maybe it’s revenge of some kind? If I were the OP, I would consider if I could be doing something that could be contributing to the problem since it is so consistent. Not saying the OP is the problem, just saying it could be a possibility.

No matter the reason why poop is getting left in the yard, I would put out a small sign with a roll of bags clipped on as a reminder to pick up. Other than that, there isn’t much that can be done other than just picking it up and moving on. Getting angry and vengeful certainly isn’t going to change anything. I certainly don’t think poop is something to waste your time thinking about.


Comment by Tinne from Tantrums and Tomatoes.

I have a very similar problem. Since my neighbors all have cats it is one of the people who walks his dog by our house. Could you please tell me where I can get that grave-sign?


Comment by Plano Mom.

Periodically I have this problem as well. I put a sign in my yard which says, “Leaving your poop in my yard is rude and inconsiderate. It is also against the law. Please be a good neighbor and clean up after your pet.”

Trust me, they have plenty of time to read that much as they wait for their dog to drop their business. I have to put it up about once or twice a year, but it take care of it immediately.

Plano Mom Reply:

Oh, and I LOVE the signs.


Comment by Jenee.

I carry a poop bag with me on every walk and all this time I could have just been leaving it in my neighbor’s yards? Silly me!

Take a vacation day and keep an eye out. Find your “poopetrator”, girl!


Comment by BrassyDel.

Probably the cheapest solution, assuming there is any sort of path next to the letter writer’s yard, is cheap garden fencing. You can get some that is about 18″ tall, 2′ wide, and made to look like wrought iron or other aesthetic options (but it’s just plastic, so cheap). Make a perimeter and it will discourage people AND dogs from crossing it. Most of them, anyway. We have many trails in our neighborhood, which backs to city park, and the short garden fencing is extremely effective and cheaper than the standard height picket fence-type options. You really can find some seriously cute ones, too!

However, I’m surprised the reply didn’t touch on the seriously appalling behaviour of literally throwing shit on your neighbor’s yard because you ASSUME it must be theirs, given that they have a dog? We already know this is a high traffic area, so I wouldn’t bet money on the neighbor being the poopetrator, let alone be confident enough to be a douche canoe about it. It’s rude, disgusting, and it actually encourages them to START letting their dogs poop on her yard as a small measure of revenge. The poop flinging has GOT to stop!

Dani Reply:

Agree on the fencing option. That is the first thing I would do. It’s pretty much a no brainer.


Comment by catperson.

Ok, I’m having a hard time understanding why no one is questioning the fact that people are walking through her “side yard” to access a trail. I understand this to mean that people are walking their dogs on her private property. If I am correct, I see no reason why these dog walkers should be allowed to traipse through someone else’s property, regardless of the easy access to the trail. How is that any different than, say, me telling my kids to go ahead and play on the neighbor’s swing set because I don’t want to buy one?

If these people want to use the trail, they should find a way to get to it without using someone else’s yard as a thoroughfare. I’m not surprised that they don’t scoop their poop since they don’t even respect the fact that they are on someone else’s property to begin with!

I’d get a No Trespassing sign before the poop signs – and I certainly wouldn’t spend MY money on poop bag’s for someone else’s dog! You know, this kind of thing is what gives dog owners a bad name.

VG Reply:


Desperate Dietwives Reply:

Yes, there is something in that!


Comment by VG.

I’m going to take a different approach here: Why are people even walking on your property in the first place? According to your letter, you state “we have numerous people who walk their dogs through our side yard to get to a trail that runs along the back of our property.” There has to be another way to get to this said trail without TRESPASSING on your property. I know you don’t want to put out the money for a surveillance system to catch the “Poopetrator”, but maybe shelling out money for a fence now will be the right price to give you a clean yard and piece of mind knowing that random dogs & people aren’t ruining your property.


Comment by Mrs. Dee.

Good fences make better neighbors I always say.


Comment by Avprobeauty.

Simple solution sign: ‘NO TRESPASSING PRIVATE PROPERTY POLICE TAKE NOTICE’. Second suggestion notify the town people are cutting through your yard to use the public trail and convince them to foot the bill for the sign.

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