13 Oct
Mouthing Off: Halloween Horror

We here at The Mouthy Housewives (also known as “The Houthy Mousewives” after two bottles of Pinot Noir) love Halloween because, well, we literally get to steal candy from babies. This year, however, our excitement has been a bit dulled by the horror we’ve been experiencing whilst shopping for our children’s costumes, and not horror in a good way like watching for another “nip slip” from Nancy Grace.

Some of the costumes we came across simply made us realize that costume makers must drink…a lot. And not in a “few glasses of wine each night with dinner” kind of way, more in a “doing beer bongs, dancing on tables and waking up in your mailman’s front yard with nothing on but his mailbag and a pile of letters for a pillow” kind of way (What? It happens!). Take a look:

But then we found these costumes, which made us feel torn: should we call Child Services or vomit on our Slankets? We decided to do both. Because we know that for twenty-something, on-the-prowl co-eds and women with the last name “Kardashian,” Halloween is a time for dressing as your favorite porn actress. But when exactly did that become acceptable (not that it is even for those of age) for children—especially young girls—to dress up this way?

Halloween is a time for imagination and creativity to run wild. A time when our children are able to be anything or anyone they wish to be. This world of possibilities, however, should NEVER EVER include eroticizing an innocent child. By doing so, we rob them of their childhood and, in most cases, their sense of self worth. Sexualizing a child, a tween, or even a teenager is disgusting and inexcusable.

Happy Halloween? It will be if nobody wears those stupid costumes.

38 Responses to “Mouthing Off: Halloween Horror”


Comment by Amy.

OMG. I am so thrilled I have two boys… who will be dressed as Batman & Robin thankyouverymuch. Some of those toddler & tween looks take me back to a recent post I saw about the string bikini for baby girls & toddler girls… GAG!

Desperate Dietwives Reply:

Same here: I was reminded of that very mouthing off article!!! O_o

natecammom Reply:

Amen Amy! Every Halloween (or anytime I walk past Justice) I am reminded how thankful I am to have two boys. Their costume choices this year….Obi Wan and Anakin. I’d love to know why the costume designers think that those costume are OK for our young girls. Ugh! Makes me sick!

WendyElissa Reply:

My two girls, aged 3 and 1, are also dressing as Batman and Robin. It was the three year old’s idea!


Comment by Kara.

Here here!! It’s bad enough that adult women objectify themselves with costumes like that. I had no idea it had drifted down to the younger set. Awful.


Comment by Kim.

That’s it! I’m putting my daughter in a hand be down dino custome from her brother.

Those slutty girls outfits are out of control.


Comment by Tinne from Tantrums and Tomatoes.

…and yet another reason why I am glad we Belgies don’t do Halloween.


Comment by Beth.

So horrifying! I can hardly go into those halloween stores because you never know what lurks down the next aisle. It’s either embarrassing or horrific. What happened to cute, original costumes?


Comment by knferrell.

I’m SO glad you guys addressed this! I have 2 very mature-looking step-daughters (almost 13 and 14) who can’t wait to dress up for halloween and go trick-or-treat-ing with their friends… except NOT! I’m 8 months pregnant and can’t waddle around all night with them, my husband will be at work until 10pm that night, and there’s no way that 2 girls over 5’6″ with curves like they have can honestly believe that they’ll be allowed to don such tiny scraps of materials and wander around in the dark where they can’t identify any would-be-predators! >.<


Comment by Karin.

My secret is out – this is why I MAKE my girls costumes! last year, they were Lava Girl (storebought scoop-neck unitard painted with glow in the dark paint, foam cuffs and boots) and Astrid from How to Train Your Dragon (jeggings, boots, a tee with the sleeves cut off, foam shoulder guards and a skirt made of strips of pleather with modelling clay spikes held on by those brads you use to make your paper character have movable limbs) – if you want pictures, let me know!

I’m off to buy a Buzz Lightyear costume for my son though! 🙂 Last year he was Dash Incredible -not Mr. Incredible – he didn’t want the muscles – and it was near impossible to find that costume!


Comment by Kimberly, Meal Mommy.

Wow. Wow. Wow. I would die if my kids even ASKED to wear these!


Comment by Momma Be Thy Name.

Hee hee! I’ll be borrowing this today! I didn’t see these when I went on my own whory costume rampage!


Comment by sharibrat.

Monster High costumes are right up there for trashy girl costumes as well 🙁


Comment by danielle.

You didn’t even touch on the costumes for toddler girls. Skirts and off the shoulder shirts. I was scarred. I can’t believe there is a market for that crap!


Comment by Wendi.

When I was in Jr. High, one of my friends suggested we all go as “ladies of the night” for Halloween. She thought a lady of the night was just a woman who’s very popular and goes on lots of dates.

We all asked our mothers if they’d make us ladies of the night costumes & I can still remember the look of horror on my mom’s face.

I think I ended up going as an Army guy that year.


Comment by Dbpromotz.

Love ’em. My son wants to go as charm school Barbie. And daughter as slutty Draculaura. .


Comment by Tracy @nystoopmama.

Are those freaking THIGH HIGHS for 8 year olds? I just gagged.

Tonya Reply:

I know! Why? Why? Why? Girls grow up too fast as it is.


Comment by kaw48911.

As long as there are mothers like those on Toddlers and Tiaras(gag), there will be a market for slut costumes.


Comment by rojopaul.

This post was hilarious. Wendi, did you write this one?

Also, I agree with kaw48911 – with shows like Toddlers & Tiaras it’s no wonder the costumes “they” come up with that they think we want. Is anyone buying this stuff??? Horrific.

As for my kids, 16 YO wants to be a prisoner in a big orange suit and the 10 YO hasn’t decided yet, but you can’t bet no one in our household will be slutty or wear something with fake brain matter on it!

Happy Halloween, ya’ll!

Tonya Reply:

Actually, I wrote it. And my eyes are still bleeding from all of the horrific costumes I looked at. So so so disturbing!

rojopaul Reply:

NO DOUBT! Loved the post, Tonya.

Steph Reply:

Thanks for the post. My sweet 8 year old asked for the Naughty cheerleader costume in the catalogue. I still don’t think she understands why I said NO!


Comment by Angie Uncovered.

Halloween is the one day a year you can wear your skanky-ass hooker looking clothes and call it a costume… unfortunately they are still your real clothes. These costumes would make me blush at any age. If your daughter can’t bend down to pick something up without showing cheeks it’s inappropriate. Thanks for posting this! (Makes me want to send it to my sister as a “what not to allow my nieces to wear” list.)


Comment by Alexandra Lynch.

Well, one of the people I have to dress keeps scrubs and a stethoscope in the closet for just such occasions. He is comfortable and costumed.

Again I bless not having girls. My eldest considers himself too old, and anyway he’s busy organizing a Halloween party for younger kids through Scouting. The youngest will change his mind six times and then get stuck with whatever I tell him to wear because we are out of time to go get things. I suspect he will just put on a tunic and trews and his cloak from medieval reenacting, because we have that, it fits, and he’s comfortable in it. He’s like his father.

Me? I’ll throw on my reenacting outfit too. If I’m wearing a skirt, it’s ankle length and full enough to move freely in, thank you.

I don’t personally think that if your size is stable it’s a bad idea to invest in one or two things that make decent costume pieces as you see them in yard sales, etc. That way what you have on is real fabric and fits you.


Comment by Ken.

I wish I had three kids so I could dress them up in the toilet costume, Elvis costume and a peanut butter and nana sandwich costume. Awesome.

I can’t even compute the sexy young girl costumes. And the sexy stance for the pirate and red riding hood….disturbing.


Comment by Cynthia M.

As bad as it is that someone designs these, what’s really horrible is that parents buy these. I kind of want to keep CPS on call Halloween night. Have a social worker come over for popcorn and cider and just pick the poor little girls up as they come to the door.

Ken Reply:

Great idea! 🙂


Comment by Marinka.

I’m going to try to squeeze into the toilet one. I hear it’s slimming.


Comment by vodka tonic.

Wildly inappropriate costumes for little girls, yes, yes, but not enough judgment yet on the blood-splatter costumes! Why, oh why, do parents let their boys have a violent free-for-all? Last year, my two year old son was traumatized by all the blood and gruesome masks, guns- and sword-wielding youngsters just looking to take a stab at him. My SIL let her 9 year old son wear something that resembled a murder scene. Charming!

Oh, and any 16 year olds should stay home and pass out candy. I’m sick of my little ones getting mowed over by rude teenagers. Halloween is my least-favorite holiday, can’t you tell??


Comment by Regina.

this is why my child will never go anywhere alone. ever. this is also why i will continue to make her costume every year for the rest of her life. sorry about your bleeding eyes, tonya, but someone has to let us know what’s going on out there!


Comment by Peyton Price.

I think I saw some of these costumes on Big Fat Gypsy wedding.


Comment by Jessica.

Great post indeed!

The even more upsetting thing is that children’s everyday clothes…and I should specify, little girl’s/tweens everyday clothes…have been too exposing, sexified, and erotic too. I received a magazine in the mail the other day specifically for tween girls and felt like it was a step away from a mini-Victoria’s Secret. Bare belly’s, tight tight clothing, low-cut shirts and pants- WTF?! It is absolutely disgusting and outrageous.


Comment by Plano Mom.

This post reminds me to go hug my modest 20 year old daughter.

And I am so very thankful for a boy. Super hero costumes that double as pajamas. Although for the last five years I’ve had to endure the endless attempts at costumes requiring gallons of fake blood.


Comment by Wombat Central.

Um, that last one? Looks more like “Hello Pussy” than “Hello Kitty.” Ugh.


Comment by Poker Chick.

OMG just posted this to my blog too – I was literally working on a post about this very topic when I read yours.


Comment by Jackie.

I totally wore the Twister costume a couple of years ago. I had a lot of fun with it (and a WHOLE lot of unwanted attention from creepy old men that should not have been attending college parties)…granted I was single and 22. however if my 11 year old niece wore it, I would definitely cut someone – no questions asked.


Comment by Let's Take the Sex Out of Halloween | The Mouthy Housewives.

[…] And here are some too sexy kids’ costumes we wrote about last year. […]

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