14 Mar
Here Comes the Bride But I’d Rather Not Go

Dear Mouthy Housewives,

My fiancé’s sister is getting married soon and I really really really do not want to go. His family is pretty dysfunctional (mine is as well, which is why we are eloping). He hasn’t talked to his mom in over 10 years (and has no plans to). She will be there. His dad only talks to him after he calls him several times. His sister only talks to him 4 or 5 times a year.

The rest of his family thinks he should marry someone within his religion (which I am not). He was asked very late in the process to be a usher, and it is all going to be very awkward for me. Should I suck it up, or find a better excuse?

Signed,

There Isn’t Enough Xanax To Get Through This Wedding

_________________________________________

Dear There Isn’t Enough Xanax,

I do not envy you, lady. Weddings can be problematic. Especially when there are lots of tense family dynamics. I feel your anguish. Which is why it hurts me to tell you that I think you should go.

Oh my gosh, did you just throw a frying pan at me?!

Hear me out…

I think it’s impressive that your fiancé wants to attend the wedding. Yes, he only talks to his sister 4 or 5 times a year but we often regret the things we don’t do the most so it’s worth showing up.

And I’m guessing your fiancé could really use your support at this shindig. He’s going to have to face a mother he hasn’t talked to in 10 years and a distant father.  That man needs you by his side! So don’t think about all his messed up, judgmental relatives, think about him. It’s one night and you just can’t make him go alone.

I think it’s ridiculous when families get upset over someone marrying outside their religion. That is between you and your husband. You two will decide what faith to practice and how to raise your children. End of story. They should be happy that he found someone to share his life with that he loves and respects.

In regards to the wedding, this is why they created wine. A few glasses (although not too much because you don’t want to end up doing the Philadelphia Chicken dance with his estranged mom) could get you through the night.

Stay by his side, be friendly and cordial and then get the heck out of there. I know you can do it.

Good luck,

Kelcey, TMH

7 Responses to “Here Comes the Bride But I’d Rather Not Go”

03.14.13#1

Comment by Avprobeauty.

I am sorry to say this, but I am so glad I’m not you! But, yes, stand by your man.

03.14.13#2

Comment by Cait.

Is there an open bar? That might make the whole experience a lot more tolerable.

Good luck!

03.14.13#3

Comment by Cherie.

I concur with mama mouthy housewife! if you go and support him and play nice he will remember that forever!

Stay sober and let all negativety slide off your shoulders!

03.14.13#4

Comment by Nik.

I pretty much agree, but you really should not expect anything, and advise keeping a low profile. I also wanted to add my support if you decide not to go.

I thought I married into a slightly dysfunctional family, little did I know how bad it was. I attended a wedding on my husband’s side and 8 years later I find out my kids “ruined” the wedding and I’m an irresponsible mom (they didn’t tell me not to bring them, but I guess I was supposed to have known and other kids were there). We didn’t talk much either over the years, so I didn’t find this out until recently they’d been harboring these thoughts, and it will take a lot for me to want to see them again. If people want to treat me badly for a day, I can handle that, but won’t subject my kids to their behavior.

03.14.13#5

Comment by diane429.

You’re guonna hate me too TIEX, but I also agree. I’m 70 and don’t have many regrets in life so far, but they’re nearly all about things not done rather than things I did do. Anyway, even if it’s really awful, it’s only one day, and you can stand anything for one day. Best of luck,

03.15.13#6

Comment by Roshni.

I agree that you should go….because the Philadelphia chicken dance (or the Harlem Shake, take your pick) may be just the thing to break the ice!!
Just sayin’!! 😀

03.17.13#7

Comment by Fragrant Liar.

Yes, stand by your man! It’s the right thing to do, and do take just enough xanax to get you through. Not too much though, or you could fall asleep in somebody’s lap, and it might not be your fiance’s. Just sayin’.

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