23 Dec
The Mouthy Housewives Help You Pack For The Holidays!

With the holidays upon us, some of us Mouthy Housewives are going to visit family. It’s crucial to pack everything one might need. To make sure nothing is forgotten it’s important to make a survival kit…err…..list.

Here are a few things we will be tucking away in our suitcase:

1. Valium – in case the booze is running low or the spouse needs a ‘time out.’

2. Elephant tranquilizer darts and spit gun – for when things get heated but you don’t want to get up because you finally grabbed the chair next to the plate of cookies.

3. Excedrine – for the migraines that come with sitting through another five hours of Aunt Sally describing her bowel surgery…again.

4. Ear plugs – for the plane ride and also to drown out annoying children, who may or may not be yours. Probably yours.

5. Zombie survival guide – because a zombie apocalypse is eerily close to what happens when the in-laws and extended families come together.

6.  War and Peace (or any hefty masterpiece) – so that you can call out “I’ll be right there, almost done!” often.

7. Smelling salts – in case of a fainting spells brought on by too much togetherness, um, happiness.

8. Voodoo doll kit – no reason.

9. A shearling coat with a fleece lining to wear indoors because your mother-in-law moved to Florida to be warm but keeps the thermostat at a very refreshing 50 degrees.

10. Your gymnastics trophy from 5th grade so when your siblings start talking about their PhD’s, you have something to brag about too.

11. Your Justin Bieber musical toothbrush because it just isn’t the holidays until you’ve had a Bieber dance off in the bathroom with your Uncle Herbert.

12. Pencil and paper, a calculator and an abacus – because although family-time, holiday travel and preparations can be trying and exhausting, we know how lucky we are and we never stop counting our blessings.

13. And, of course, the gifts!  If you’re like us and waited until the last minute, it’s going to be ok, we can give you some help on that too!

Happy Holidays from The Mouthy Housewives!

One Response to “The Mouthy Housewives Help You Pack For The Holidays!”


Comment by Jules.

WHY did I just read this now? Total FAIL on my part! GAH!

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