31 Mar
Meet Your New Mom and Dad!

Dear Mouthy Housewives,

I am getting married in June and my fiancé told me that his parents would like me to call them “mom and dad.” I’m not happy about this but I don’t want to offend them.

Signed,

How Many Parents Do I Need?

______________________________________________

Dear How Many Parents Do I Need,

I think every family is different. For example, some families kiss on the cheek. Others kiss on the lips. And still others make out with their dogs. The point is each family has its own comfort zone. So you have to determine what feels right for you.

It’s very sweet that your in-laws now think of themselves as your mom and dad. But I totally understand if you’re not ready for this. Heck, sometimes I call my own parents Susie and Tom because I’m not always 100% convinced they are actually related to me.

In my opinion, the words “mom” and “dad” are really a special honor. I mean, these are supposed to be the people who stayed up with you all night when you were vomiting all over your bedroom, who held your hand on the first day of Kindergarten and who put up with you through the teenage years when you sported that asymmetrical haircut and a ridiculous attitude. They earned the right to be called mom and dad.

Tell your fiancé that you’re not quite ready to refer to his parents this way. You shouldn’t be pressured into this or feel like you’re offending anyone. And when you’re ready, you can casually work it into conversation like, “Hey, mom and dad, we could really use some money for a down payment on a new house.” Something low key like that.

And if you’re never ready, that’s OK too.

Signed,

Kelcey (Not your mom or dad), TMH

8 Responses to “Meet Your New Mom and Dad!”

03.31.10#1

Comment by Michelle.

It’s OK that your not ready, but enjoy the sentiment. My in laws are crazy and they hate me, so you are very lucky! I typically refer to them as “those people” or “DH’s mom and dad”. I never even call them by name. Ooops!

Anyway, just appreciate the fact that they love you and want you to be part of the family.

03.31.10#2

Comment by Michelle.

That is strange. I think it’s sweet that they consider you “family” and think it’s ok for you to call them mom and dad….but I would have a hard time with that. I just think it’s…weird?

03.31.10#3

Comment by GrandeMocha.

I call my FIL “Pops” & his wife (not my husband’s mother) “Mary”. Maybe you can think of something else to call them.

03.31.10#4

Comment by Erin at Im Gonna Kill Him.

My aunt once told me, before I was marrying, that a woman who loved her own mother could never call another woman ‘mom.’ I agree with that. Plus, I’m from Jersey so any mother in law of mine would probably shudder to be called MAAAAAH (mandatory yelling)

03.31.10#5

Comment by Marinka, The Mouthy Housewives.

At least they don’t want you to call them “mommy” and “daddy”. Yet.

04.01.10#6

Comment by Vodka Tonic.

It could be worse. I dropped the “mom and dad” act briefly at the age of 4, and permanently by 19.

04.01.10#7

Comment by MarathonMom.

oh honey it can be some much worse……

04.16.10#8

Comment by Bonnie Wienke.

Hoping you and your in laws and their son have a long and happy life together! I had the mother in law from hell so weird or sweet would have been a nice change. I would tell them you are not quite ready to call them “mom” and “dad” as you call your parents that, but will come up with something cute as time goes by and you feel more comfortable. Good luck.

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