07 Jun
The Liquored Up Remodeler

Dear Mouthy Housewives,

I have a serious problem. EVERYTHING sounds like a good idea after two glasses of wine. Recently, I was doing a closet clean out. It’s amazing what you find in a clean closet! It got out of hand, though. I removed the carpet from my closet. What can I say, it was dirty and I was tipsy. My husband was not amused and is threatening to take away my wine glass. HELP!

Signed,

Rugless Wino

_________________________

Dear Rugless Wino,

You may not know this, but I moved into a new house about six months ago. It’s a wonderful place, for sure, except I really hate the tile in the master bathroom. But unfortunately, right now we can’t afford to have someone come in and remove it. Or can we?

Perhaps I should now mention that my new house also has a wine cellar?

MATCH MADE IN HEAVEN, BABY!

Seriously, if you’re industrious enough to pull up carpet with a couple of glasses of wine in you, I’m 100% positive that you’ll have my bathroom ready for House Beautiful after you slug back an entire bottle of Merlot. Maybe I’ll even throw in a few snorts of pinot grigo and set you loose on that weird stain in the playroom. Seriously, people, sometimes I don’t even have to try around here.

But supposing you can’t make it all the way to Austin, let’s suggest something different: just have ONE glass of wine a night. Because one is all you really need to get that nice, relaxed feeling you’re going for, right? Anything more than that and things can get a little fuzzy, at least in my experience. (“What do you mean, I called the neighbor ‘Cujo in Culottes’? I don’t remember that!”)

Another thing to try is drinking white wine spritzers, where you’re getting a full glass to drink with only half of the alcohol content.  That way you can still have your two glasses and not everything will sound like such a great idea.

Except for my bathroom remodel, right? I’m thinking granite.

Good luck,

Wendi, TMH

 

5 Responses to “The Liquored Up Remodeler”

06.07.12#1

Comment by RMScott731.

My mom did that when I was a kid… only it was the entire first floor… and she was sober…

06.07.12#2

Comment by Plano Mom.

Just because hubs isn’t amused doesn’t mean it wasn’t a good idea. Replace it with a washable rug or rugs and pretend it was your plan all along.

06.07.12#3

Comment by rojopaul.

I tossed my glass mirror closet doors because there was a crack in one of them. My intention was to replace them, of course. It’s been 16 months and there’s always something else that needs to be handled first. But the good news is my closet looks better now than when I could fill it up with junk and close the doors. I like Plano Mom’s idea of throwing down some washable rugs. Great solution until you can redo your carpet or flooring! And just tell hubs to get over it – it’s a closet for goodness’ sake! It’s not like what RMScott731’s mom did. (too funny, btw)

06.11.12#4

Comment by Oops!.

Ha funny that this was posted over the weekend as I got tipsy AGAIN friday night and pulled up the entire flooring in our sun room. We’d had a leak and it was molding a bit. Up went the carpet and sub flooring. Now I’m looking down at the floor wondering what I’m going to do about it.

06.12.12#5

Comment by karena.

are you my mother in law? pretty sure she does this monthly…

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