Migraine, Yougraine
Dear Mouthy Housewives,
How can I get my husband to prevent and treat his migraine headaches?
He gets migraines probably 8-10 times each year and they seem to be brought on by dehydration, lack of regular meals, changes in regular schedule, and traveling across timezones.
His headaches have ruined more than a few football tailgates and vacation dinners. Once, he even fainted and collapsed on an airplane over the Atlantic as a migraine was coming on. I thought he was dying of an aneurysm. SO FUN.
I am not interested in nagging him to drink water, lay off the beer, and eat something, but if I don’t, he doesn’t work to prevent migraines, and I end up taking care of his vomiting-self, which is no fun either.
Signed,
Nobody’s Mother
P.S. I realize how ridiculous this questions sounds. I do. Why would anyone NOT work to prevent migraines? I know.
__________________________________
Dear Nobody’s Mother,
What is it about some men refusing to take care of themselves? And lacking common sense?
My highly educated guess is that your husband either expects you to take care of him or that he doesn’t see the correlation between his daily habits and the migraines. It’s a toss up as to which is more infuriating.
But there are steps that you can take to deal with this. First, please make sure that your husband goes to the doctor and gets an official diagnosis and a treatment plan, if he hasn’t already. There’s something about having Marcus Welby, M.D. talk to him that may make an impression on him. (If Marcus Welby isn’t available, Maybe Dr. McDreamy can squeeze you in).
And yes, it is telling that I am asking you to take your husband to the doctor, as though he were a child. And yet pharmaceutical companies selling prostate treatment advertise in women’s magazines for a reason. We are the caretakers. God help us.
Assuming that your husband doesn’t suffer from Munchausen Syndrome (which apparently doesn’t involve the uncontrollable munchies), I recommend that you have a conversation with him that does not involve sock puppets. Like adults.
Sit him down and lay down the law.
Along the lines of this script:
Hi honey, you look nice. Handsome. Dashing. Sexy. I love you. Is that a new shirt? I like it! Hey, you know what I don’t like? When I think that you’re dying of a brain aneurysm. It makes me sad and unhappy and panicked. But great news! I recently read an article about how testicular clipping can ease the migraines. The science isn’t all there yet, but I figure it’s worth a shot, right? Sure, the surgery is uncomfy, but no more migraines! Yay! What do you say?
Chances are he will resist. Some nonsense about how there must be some less drastic measure. What kind of less drastic measures, you will ask, eyes widening. Channel your inner Sarah Palin as she is asked about evolution. He will probably list the very items you mentioned.
Ask him to commit to taking these important steps to prevent migraines, explaining lovingly that you become so consumed with worry when he has them that you must take to your bed immediately for bonbon consumption and recuperation with Bravo.
Don’t be afraid to demonstrate these restorative spells yourself. Hopefully by the time you’re done with the Real Housewives of Atlanta marathon, something will click for him.
Good luck,
Marinka, TMH
9 Responses to “Migraine, Yougraine”
Comment by Kati.
My hubby has similar issues, only with horrible heartburn that sometimes mimics a heart attack. Usually because he eats junk and won’t listen to me.
I’m gonna try the testicular clipping suggestion.
[Reply]
Comment by Jules.
It is so important for him to see a neurologist! I’ve had migraines for the past 20 years. I was treating them myself until this past year. Lo and behold, I found out that almost everything I was doing was wrong. Now, my migraines have decreased tremendously, all because of my neurologist!
[Reply]
Comment by Plano Mom.
For every hour spent wiping his brow and cleaning his barf, an equal hour spent rubbing your back and watching Beaches.
[Reply]
Comment by Alexandra.
It sounds so basic: but does he have a chart up?
You know, like a little kid?
You could make him a chart to carry in his wallet and to tape up to the bathroom mirror:
Migraine prevention checklist: and then show a picture of someone violently vomiting: Call it THIS WILL BE YOU IF YOU DON”T
.drink water
.get 7 hours sleep
.not eat every 4 hours
[Reply]
Comment by Megan.
Why are men like five-year-olds? They cannot stand being told what to do, and will do the exact opposite just for spite. I swear.
I second the doctor idea – make him go. It can’t hurt.
[Reply]
Comment by Danielle.
Ah yes. I’ve suffered from migraines for as long as I can remember. The water thing is VERY important. After the fainting on the airplane episode I would have been in such a massive snit my husband would have done anything to make me happy. That’s the secret to life. We have the power to make their lives tremendously miserable. Channel and use that power!
[Reply]
Comment by Charity.
He definitely should get checked out by a doctor if he hasn’t already.
My husband also gets migraines from not eating or staying hydrated. With my husband, I have no problem caring for him when he’s sick. Unless it was something he brought on himself by his own carelessness, like not stopping to eat when he needs. Then, I’ll do the absolute necessities, but that’s about it unless I’m feeling generous. I love him, but I’m not his mother.
Oddly enough, it seems like he’s getting better about preventing the migraines since I stopped reacting to them as an illness.
[Reply]
Comment by I Have Migraines And Mother Problems | The Mouthy Housewives.
[...] have to ask– have you sought medical attention for your migraines? Although it sounds like you are doing everything possible to make the best of the situation by [...]
Leave a Comment
The Mouthy Housewives respect everyone's opinion, however, if you're attacking other commentors, you will be deleted. And sent to your room until you can play nicely.
RSS Feed
Comment by Question.
[...] I’m over at The Mouthy Housewives today, advising a woman whose husband acts like a giant baby and won’t take responsibility [...]