Dear Mouthy Housewives,
I want my husband to start shaving his arms and legs. We have been married for 3 years now. He used to let me shave them but after about a year into the marriage he stopped allowing me to do it.
What are some ways I could convince him to start doing this? I hate body hair.
I Don’t Dig Gorillas
Dear I Don’t Dig Gorillas,
Wow, have you made me feel better! And here I was feeling bad that I pretended to like Chinese food when I first started dating my husband. But your spouse apparently pretended that he liked shaving his legs and arms?!
I really bow down to you lady. I can not believe you convinced your husband to do this for so long (an entire year into your marriage!). Most wives have much smaller marital dreams. Like maybe convincing their husbands to put dirty dishes into the dishwasher instead of the more popular sink option.
Just out of curiosity, how long does it take to shave his arms and legs? You, of course, can email me privately with this pivotal information.
You have three options here. You can accept him the way he is. I mean, I would love for my husband to have Ryan Gosling abs but let’s be realistic. There is a better chance that Ryan Gosling will be my second husband than that happening. So I accept the love of my life the way he is (at least 99% of the time, okay 80% but whatever).
Your second option is to convince him to become a professional swimmer which will require him to remove all body hair. But then of course, he’ll constantly smell like chlorine.
Or finally, you can tell your husband that you think it’s SO SEXY when he shaves his arms and legs and you would really love for him to do it again. You can offer something in return but good lord, I hope he doesn’t ask you to watch the entire baseball season with him because those games are on EVERY SINGLE NIGHT. Be careful.
In the end, he still might not want to do it. And ultimately that’s what marriage is all about – accepting and loving your spouse for who he is, not who you wish he would be. And with that final morsel of wisdom, I’m off to move all the dishes out of the sink and into the dishwasher.