11 Jan
She Can’t Stand Me, Can We Still Be Friends?

Dear Mouthy Housewives,

My friend accidentally sent me an e-mail that was meant for her husband. She told her husband she can’t stand me anymore. Should I still be her friend?


Maybe Friend


Dear Maybe,



Marinka, TMH

P.S.  Well, maybe you could borrow some money from her before your break-up.  To be returned to her as soon as the economy perks up, of course.

Whew, I had to get that out of my system.

Now get it out of yours.

If you were surprised and hurt by the email, let her know. If her friendship is important to you, tell her that as well.  The truth is that everyone is annoying sometimes and hard to stand. If we all shed friends at the first sign of their being a pain in the what the British call arse, friendship would become a thing of the past.  And then who would we connect with on Facebook?

But you will not know if your relationship stands a chance unless you clear the air with her.  Was she just venting to her husband? Does she feel like your friendship has run its course?  Is there any hope for the two of you, good Lord, you will do anything to change if she just gives you another chance, plus you have cash! And jewels!  Well, you get the idea.  Only you know if you want to pursue this friendship.

However, if she is being hurtful, feel free to send a few emails of your own.  Just make sure that you address them to definitely NotHer.

Good luck,

Marinka, TMH

9 Responses to “She Can’t Stand Me, Can We Still Be Friends?”


Comment by redgirl.

Aaaah yes. The misdirected email. I’ve received a few of those; always difficult to approach the person afterwards, but Marinka is right. The air must be cleared…


Comment by The Good Cook.

How does one accidentally send an email intended for their husband to another? Do they have the same name? Freud would say there are no accidents…


Comment by Wendi.

I agree with Good Cook. I don’t know how “accidentally” that happened.


Comment by Shell.

Yikes. Thinking it wasn’t an accident, but a passive aggressive way to say “see ya!”


Comment by soccermom.

I’m thinking that it wasn’t by accident at all. I’m thinking “see ya” is appropriate, who needs friends like that!


Comment by HellTygr.

A simple reply to the email with “I think you didn’t mean to send this directly to me?” can do wonders. I totally agree that this was a passive-aggressive oopsie.

Not knowing the status of the friendship otherwise, it’s hard to say if it was just venting, it’s true that sometimes you just vent for your audience and it might be the husband that can’t stand “Maybe”? I know I’ve said some things about people that would be taken way harsher than intended by a different audience if I’d said it to someone else (or the subject).


Comment by amy.

Ouch! Really, you think someone could be so cruel as to ‘accidentally’ do that? I like the above commenters suggestion, to let her know you got it and let her deal with the next step.


Comment by the mama bird diaries.

The misaddressed email is a problem that is skyrocketing and must be addressed by the Obama administration immediately.


Comment by Happy Gal.

Why waste time with games? Perhaps you should just reply to the email that you got “by accident” and appologize for what ever you did and wish her well and end the friendship. Who wants to be friends with someone that doesn’t like you anyway? Not me!

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