16 Mar
I’m Free Now. Why Aren’t You?

Dear Mouthy Housewives,

I have two friends that I have known since we were young.   As we got older the typical thing happened and we spent less time hanging out. I got a boyfriend who turned more serious and we have two kids together.   I saw my friends every now and then (birthdays, Christmas, baby showers, and the odd “let’s get together!”).

My boyfriend is now my ex and my friends are involved in relationships. I’m trying to see them to hang out but it seems to be an impossible task. Should I take this personally? Did I do something wrong or am I worrying too much? I’m thinking I should talk to them about it but because we aren’t as close as we used to be it feels a little weird to be all whiny about it.

Signed, the Forgotten Friend


Dear Forgotten Friend,

A funny thing happens when people fall in love… they take all the important and fulfilling relationships in their lives (their friends, their parents, their dog) and they blow everyone off. Yes, even the dog. And they do this to spend time with this new person who either will turn out to to be the love of their life or a total jerk who will break up with them via text after they’ve paid his way through graduate school.

Not that this happened to me.

But I hope he really enjoys that stupid anthropology degree.

First, you blew your friends off for your boyfriend. And now they are deeply involved in their own relationships. But this will shift. Because after you’ve spent 24/7 with someone for 2 straight months, you suddenly jolt out of bed and want three things…

1. Some bloody alone time.

2. To finally pay your bills.

3. To go to drinks with your girlfriends.

So if your friends are in new relationships, be patient. And then send a nice email that says, “I really miss you. It would be so fun to get together. Name the date and I’ll be there. Drinks are on me.”

Hopefully, they’ll jump at the chance to see you. Good luck.


Kelcey, TMH

5 Responses to “I’m Free Now. Why Aren’t You?”


Comment by Yuliya.

You said the magic words “drinks are on me”


Comment by annie.

Wait, was that a hypothetical email or are drinks really on you Kelsey? Because I’d fly to NY for that.

ps – great advice – take it Forgotten Friend.


Comment by Wendi.

Great advice.

And drinks are ALWAYS on Kelcey.


Comment by Heather, TMH.

Damn it, I knew I missed something at BlogHer ’10 – Kelcey picking up the drink tab!


Comment by Diane.

Pick one night a month for jailbreak. We moms ure usually uber planners. This last minute stuff never works but if something is on the calendar – in black Sharpie not pencil – it is sacrosanct. It does happen.

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