Dear Mouthy Housewives,
I have a friend from college who has always been sweet and fun, and in recent years helped me tremendously with my boys while I finished a degree. However, she can be a bit sensitive (read: paranoid) and motherly (read: irritating) at times. We had a falling out after college over a trivial email I sent. Fast-forward about 4-5 years later and I randomly find her again through MySpace. This time she answered my email, so we met up for coffee. We cried, hugged and apologized, and everything was better.
I figured we’d both grown and all that, but I’ve recently found myself on the receiving end of her silent treatment once again. It’s been a few months now and I still haven’t heard from her after repeated attempts to contact her. Frankly, I’m getting a bit annoyed that I have to work so hard to keep this friendship alive. What should I do? Is this something I need to walk away from, or should I try–once again–to track her down and work things out?
Friendship in Limbo
Dear Friendship in Limbo,
When first reading this I thought TMH had received a new reality TV pilot in our inbox. But before I could pretend spend the royalties we’d collect off of this obvious future hit series, I realized this is a real problem from a reader. Now I’m pissed.
That’s me giving you the silent treatment. Now it’s your turn to repeatedly call, text, and/or email me in a sad attempt to gain my attention, but it will be no match against my imaginary powers of pettiness. Not even skywriting to me can diminish my powers!
You said it yourself – you’re both grown. At least you’ve grown. It sounds like your friend is caught in a junior high time warp and stuck at the age fourteen. No one should work that hard to keep a friendship. Yes, relationships take effort, but let’s remember the difference between effort and being jerked around by the other person.
You’ve made several attempts to confront the situation and resolve the problem. If she’s not willing to meet you half way, there’s nothing else you can do. So I say save your energy for something more fun. And let’s face it, clipping old lady toenails would be more fun than this.