Welcome to Guest Mouthy Housewife Friday! Today’s Guest is the lovely Le Shallow Gal. Don’t let the French fool you, she’s very approachable. Even though she uses footnotes. She also holds the honor of being one of the few bloggers in the world who’s been over to my house. Which means that she observed my housewifery in action. Thanks, SG, for taking one for the team and doing the housewifely duty this Friday! – Marinka, TMH
Dear Mouthy Housewives,
Why are people so heartbroken when a geriatric celebrity dies? And am I dead inside because I don’t care about Dennis Hopper, Gary Coleman, and Golden Girl Rue? And what do I tell friends who seem to sit shiva for every Hollywood geezer that keels over?
Celebrity Death Match
Dear Celebrity Death Match,
Dennis Hopper, Gary Coleman and Rue McClanahan all died within a week of each other? Wow, bad things really do happen in two and a half (1). But honey, if you’re looking for an impartial evaluation of your empathetic appropriateness, you’ve come to the wrong place.
Now the first part of your question is really more of a psych 101 final, so here’s my blue book in a nutshell. Celebrity deaths are sad because: people become aware of their mortality / Celebrities are raised to a deity-like status and thought to be immortal / People feel like they know famous people and thus feel like they lost a friend.
But I’m not making the big bucks (2) for helping community college students cheat on an exam, but rather for giving advice, so here it is:
There are different levels of celebrity mourning. Making a Michael Jackson playlist for a party? Acceptable. Buying and bronzing everything Billy Mays ever hawked? Not acceptable. I’m assuming your friends falls somewhere in the middle. (3)
Therefore, just smile, agree how sad it is and change the subject to whether Jill and Bethenny are going to be able to salvage their friendship. If the subject returns to the dearly departed, a simple “I’m so sorry for your loss” should make them realize how silly they sound, while sounding sincere enough to avoid being called a heartless bitch.
But if they’re serving lox from Zabars at these little shiva gatherings, let me know. For the right Kosher spread, I may be able to work up a little angst.
Amy, Guest TMH
1) How creepy is it that Gary Coleman’s casket already had his name on it?
I could do this all day.
2) Any previous guest poster who did not receive their check and gift basket needs to let Marinka know ASAP.
3) If they’re on the Billy Mays side of the spectrum, I’m afraid you need new friends.