01 Jul
Play Date Pool Etiquette

Dear Mouthy Housewives,

My daughter Sadie is 11 and our neighbor’s daughter Alexis is 9.  Alexis’ grandparents have a pool and Alexis invited Sadie to come swim.  Alexis is used to getting her way so her grandpa said yes. This is the first time in 2 years that Sadie has been invited to swim. I said only 30 minutes because we had plans that day.

My daughter Sadie doesn’t swim well and I was under the impression that the grandma would watch them swim, but based on what my daughter told me, I don’t think they were supervised well. Plus, Alexis begged Sadie to jump off the diving board after I told both of them she had to stay in the shallow end.

I am not technically invited to go to their house, but feel like I need to if she goes swimming. And they may not really want Sadie over there and are just letting Alexis have her way.  So do you think I should go over there to watch her swim? She was invited today and Sadie begged but I just said no. I don’t want to annoy Alexis’ grandparents. What do you think?

Signed,

Mi Pool, Tu Pool?

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Dear Mi Pool, Tu Pool,

My grandparents had a pool growing up and I loved inviting friends over to swim. And I think they loved it too because my grandmother would always bring us ice tea with real mint leaves poolside.  Real mint leaves! Can you imagine that kind of service today?

And yes, there was that small incident when I rode my bicycle into the pool but overall it was pretty stress-free and enjoyable for them having me and my friends over.

I wouldn’t assume that Alexis’ grandparents don’t want Sadie over. If only there was some kind of telepathic way to know for sure. Wait – I’ve got it. And this is better than mental telepathy – the telephone!

Just give them a call and say, “Alexis has invited Sadie over to swim. I wanted to make sure it’s okay and not a bother for you.” And if they agree to have her over with a hearty, “No problem!” then please say the following. “Sadie isn’t a strong swimmer so would you mind if I came over and watched the girls in the pool?” I can imagine them being very relieved that you are taking on the responsibility and they don’t have to worry about their safety in the pool.

And that is really the most important part because WATER IS DANGEROUS.  Please take it from someone whose sister almost drowned, you can not be too cautious around water.  Children (even strong swimmers) need to be watched in the pool because anything can happen.  If possible, I would also sign Sadie up for some swim instruction as soon as possible.  Then both of you can feel more comfortable when she is in the water.

Good luck,

Kelcey, TMH

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